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Bite Me: A Love Story by Christopher Moore

Christopher Moore‘s Bite Me: A Love Story continues to the trials of the Countess Jody, Lord Flood, and their minion Abby Normal.  It is the third book in the series set in San Francisco and focuses mainly on Goth teenager Abby Normal, her boy-toy and ultra-nerd Foo Dog (aka Steve), and her gay BFF Jared as they battle a city of vampyre cats . . . and rats.  The Emperor of San Francisco and Detectives Cavuto and Rivera return along with the Animals, Flood’s former colleagues of the Safeway stocking crew.

“I am Nosferatu, bee-yotch.”  (page 176)

“It just goes to show you, like Lord Byron says in the poem:  ‘Given enough weed and explosives, even a creature of most sophisticated and ancient dark power can be undone by a few stoners.’

I’m paraphrasing.  It may have been Shelley.”  (page 6-7)

Moore’s writing is crass and humorous and will have readers laughing out loud about how thick Abby is and yet so smart about the magical.  He has a way with language and creating and adopting slang for his characters, like booticuity, ownage, Mombot, va-jay-jay, and Skankenstein boots.   The vampyres are equally good and bad in this novel, but Abby and her friends are all that stand between San Francisco and total annihilation.  From katanas to LED sunlight jackets and UV lamps to flame throwers and Grandma’s special tea, these kids have tricked out rides and kung-fu skills like no one else.

“The outside city people live on, like, a different plane of existence, like they don’t even see the inside people either.  But when you’re a vampyre, the two cities are all lit up.  You can hear the people talking and eating and watching TV in their houses, and you can see and feel the people in the streets, behind the garbage cans, under the stairs.  All these auras show, sometimes right through walls.  Like life, glowing.” (page 226)

Even more enjoyable is how Moore intertwines other story lines from his previous books, particularly Dirty Job.  It is fun for readers to see how characters from other novels pop in and add spice to the vampyre mayhem.  Moore is a very talented writer with a gift for making readers laugh.  Those who love vampire novels should read the entire series — Bloodsucking Fiends and You SuckBite Me is another laugh-out-loud novel from Moore for those of us who need to step into another world, destress, and laugh intelligently.

This is my 1st book for the 2010 Vampire Series Challenge.

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FTC Disclosure:  I got my copy of the book from the local library!